Oceano Frontman Basically Says He Quit The Band

Remember a few weeks back we had heard a rumor about Chicago douchecore act Oceano throwing in the towel, and we were so fucking jazzed, we beat off out our fourth floor window — and jizzed on those unsuspecting old ladies whilst they were smoking cigarettes on the sidewalk below?

Remember?

Well, it looks like that rumor may have been a little true. The bad news is, Oceano will likely carry on as a band. The mediocre news is that they’ll have to do it without frontman Adam Warren, who basically dispels the notion that all black dudes are hung like giraffes.

Warren commented online tonight about Killswitch Engage booting vocalist Howard Jones.

“I’m shocked, but well…If Killswitch can go on after 9 years and 3 albums without Mr. Jones on vox… Why couldn’t a certain band with out me? (2 albums and a mere 3 years) Just sayin.”

Ah, you’re a douche.

Warren later offered this explanation for leaving Oceano, which, shockingly, is not “Well, I took a cold, hard look at Oceano, realized we were the audio equivalent of a miscarriage, and I bailed.” Nope — he “got a son that’s growing quick to provide for and I don’t wanna miss a second of it. I keep it real. I’m workin on some projects here at home, they’ll pop up when I get time away from father duties to dig deeper.”

Oceano has yet to comment on the matter.